Our builder says that we are on schedule – so everything will be done by next Friday.
When Ethel told me this, my eyes rolled so much that I was worried they were going to come right out of the sockets.
The landscaper was supposed to start this week (after originally obligated to be there on July 24th)– he didn’t. He did park a trailer and small tractor at the house. I suppose that that is a form of “started”. The fence company can’t come back until after the landscaper is done. So, there’s that. (I laid out thousands of advance dollars and scheduled things months in advance to insure that the sod would be in and established before we moved in, so that the dogs wouldn’t tear it up. Wanna hear God laugh? Tell Him that you prepaid subcontractors and expected them to show up).
The external doors – front door and doors into, and out of, the garage – were all being painted by a local company who “bakes” the paint on external doors like an auto paint finish. They’ve had the doors for over three months. They started to deliver them this week, and realized that they’d messed them up – so, ooops! They now say that they’ll be there on Tuesday.
The tub was in, and then Ethel told ’em that they’d put the faucet in the wrong place – so now the tub is back out, and we’ve got to wait on plumbers and tile folks to coordinate. That has “forever” written all over it. (I’d’a left it alone – I knew that getting the tile guy ANYWHERE, for ANY REASON, is like pulling teeth. But Ethel was insistent).
The granite was supposed to be done by “the end of the month”. It might be delivered tomorrow, or maybe Monday. Until the granite is in, the plumber can’t put in the bathroom and kitchen and laundry room sinks and faucets –
– and, until the granite is in, the gas cooktop can’t be installed in the island. And the gas cooktop will be delivered on Tuesday, along with all of the other appliances. So if the granite isn’t there, I reckon we’ll put the cooktop in the bathtub, which isn’t in, either.
While the appliances are coming in on Tuesday, they’ll be coming in around the carpet guys, who will – allegedly – be putting the carpet down on Tuesday, as well. Tuesday will either be a very, very busy day – or nothing at all will happen, because they’ll all call and say “Can’t do it today, because of <fill in reason>”.
On Wednesday, the internet gets installed; it’s my intention to take the bikes, Wahoo Kickrs and screens over there and install them then, assuming that the carpet is in.
I have no idea when the gutter guy is going to show up and put in the gutters, or when the roofers will return with the rusted corrugated metal that we are using as accent siding. I’m not sure that I even believe that they ever really laid out the corrugated metal “up on the mountain” to get it pre-rusted. We’ll see.
Ethel has taken to saying that this whole custom construction thing is like a house of cards – a balancing act. I, myself, don’t think so – because there are people who can, indeed, build a house of cards and make it stand. This is more along the lines of a travesty – a pretense at order; a bit of conscious dishonesty, with everybody pretending that they are actually committed to a schedule and then going home and drinking a six pack and laughing about the whole thing (wink, wink, nudge, nudge).
None of the closets are built out; none of the plumbing is actually hooked up to the water.
So, for now, we’ll all pretend that all of this stuff is actually going to happen as, ahem, “planned”, and that the house will be finished by next Friday.
But one thing that ain’t pretend, at all – on Tuesday the 10th, the movers show up and take all of our furniture over there. That’s gonna be real.
Of course, the furniture might be sitting on plywood because there’s no carpet, and the clothes might be laying on the floor in the closets, and we might be eating at restaurants because the appliances are sitting in the garage.
And there may not be a front door.
But the stuff will be there.
(Actually, TODAY was the day that the house was SUPPOSED to be finished. We’re carefully not mentioning that, out loud, to anyone. It would be setting fire to the Emperor’s new clothes while he was still wearing them.)